Last night at Awakin Circle Santa Clara, the Awakin Reading was a poem by Parag Shah for his sister. I don't have any sisters, but the first person who came to mind was Pavi. Pavi is my sister because she treats me like a brother--looking out for me, checking in on me, sending me prayers and blessings, and sharing sympathic joy or compassion with what I am experiencing.

Then I realized I had other sisters. Guri is my older sister. She is firm in her insistence that I take care of myself. Trishna called me from London when I was having a real tough time in Hawaii during my illness. It was like we suddenly became family. Audrey is like a cute younger sister. She brings so much joy into our family.

It felt wonderful to think about all the sisters that I now have even though I come from a family of all boys. Then Dinesh Uncle got the mic and said that he and Harshida Aunty were just talking about how I hadn't been to Awakin Circle in the past month, and how surprised and happy he was to see me. I can't tell you how much this small gesture meant to me. Dinesh Uncle and Harshida Aunty are more like mother and father to me than uncle and aunty. Of course, they welcome us all into their home, but they do so much more.

My mother suffered a terrible loss when my father, the love of her life, went missing in action in Vietnam when I was three years old. My younger brother was less than a month old, having never met his father in person. My brothers and I believe my mother put up some walls after that loss. Harshida Aunty shared at the last Awakin Kids circle how as parents we need to be attached to our children, but also a bit detached. I think my mom tends to detach more than attach with my brothers and I.

Sometimes I will play a game and not call my mom for a month, hoping that she will call. Weeks go by and nothing. When I finally pick up the phone and call her, she is very perfunctory--just asking if I need something or when Jett's baseball game is. She seems uncomfortable talking for more than a few minutes.

So when I learned that Harshida Aunty and Dinesh Uncle were talking about me missing Awakin Circle, it felt like getting that phone call from my mother that I had been waiting for.

The first time I entered the Kindness Temple in Santa Clara it felt like home. My sons often chirp out when we drive down Lawrence Expressway, "That is where Harshida Aunty lives!" Then they inevitably say, "Can we get lemonade?" because Harshida Aunty always gives them fresh squeezed lemonade. I can't tell you how much it means to me to have ohana (Hawaiian for family) just down the road. And how lucky Jett and Fox are to have a loving Tutu (Hawaiian for grandmother) in the area.



When I was first introduced to Awakin circles, calls, and readings, I focused on awakening. How could these offerings lead or speed me to awakening? I now realize that I was missing the whole point. The "kin" in Awakin is what I needed, wanted, and was lacking more than awakening.

Recently, Ari shared the story of Ananda and the Buddha watching the Sangha work and live together:

Ven. Ananda said to the Buddha, "This is half of the holy life, lord: admirable friendship, admirable companionship, admirable camaraderie." "Don't say that, Ananda. Don't say that. Admirable friendship, admirable companionship, admirable camaraderie is actually the whole of the holy life. When a monk has admirable people as friends, companions, & comrades, he can be expected to develop and pursue the noble path.

I had heard this story a number of times, but I think I finally get it. I am so grateful for all the kin in ServiceSpace. You are my ohana, and you inspire me to pursue the noble path.

Me Ke Aloha Pumehana (With Warm Love and Affection)
Makala Kozo